Chip,
Can you please speak on the best way to attract a great relationship? I feel like I’ve been trying forever, to no avail. (Maybe that’s my problem?)
Now I feel discouraged and like throwing in the towel on the whole matter. I know what feels good to me to visualize but I don’t know if that really exists in reality. Maybe I have to settle. Maybe I’m not allowed to really have it. Maybe I have to learn a whole bunch of lessons first before it comes along. I just don’t know. I’m confused and don’t know how to sort it out.
My guess is that the idea of “throwing in the towel” feels like relief. But you still want the relationship.
Your intuition was talking pretty loudly to you when you wrote this, wasn’t it? You are trying to manage the creation of this relationship because you think if you don’t do something, it isn’t going to happen.
I’ve got news for you. Your intuition is telling you, “It’s done. You have that relationship. You’ve created it. Let it come to you.”
Think of it like ordering a book from Amazon. You placed the order, now you just have to wait the 5-8 working days for it to arrive. The last thing you would do is notice on day three that it isn’t there yet and order the book again. But that is what we do when we try to make it happen. We notice that we don’t have it yet, and when we do, the Universe knocks the book off the UPS conveyer belt and your package is delayed. Then after you forget about it, some janitor finds the book and puts it back on the belt.
Think of this new dream relationship in the same way you would think of the book you ordered from Amazon. If you knew in uncertain terms that your person was coming, how would you be acting? Would you be going out and enjoying other people’s company—not intending to get serious, but hey, company at movies is fun? Dancing is fun. Flirting is fun. Eating out is fun. Would you enjoy benefits?
Would you spend time preparing your space for a new person, or would you be organizing your stuff so that you got rid of the things that you wouldn’t want to move?
If it were me, I would say, “Now that I have my relationship, what can I do to best celebrate being ‘single’ before the person shows up?”
Undoubtedly, you will experience some contrast. The relationship you are asking for is a different vibration than the vibration you currently hold. The contrast that comes up is merely pointing out thoughts you are thinking that are delaying your person’s arrival. Listen to what they are saying. Often it is as simple as making a turning it around: “Not allowed to have it? How interesting. Of course, I can have it. I can have anything I want.” Or, “Maybe I have to learn a bunch of lessons. Ha ha. As if I could get it wrong!”
This can be very easy. The contrast is merely giving you the opportunity to replace unaligned thoughts.
Relax. Enjoy yourself while the “package” is coming. Stay home or go out as you are inspired to do. This relationship is a done deal.
Please scroll down to comment or ask a clarifying question.
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This question arrived just as I was finishing the previous one. As a general rule, I like to answer questions promptly. But I’m sure there will be times that for one reason or another, it might be delayed. But don’t be surprised when questions get posted on the same day as another question.
Chip
(c)2013 Chip Engelmann